Shit-post

Out with the old, in with the new: Your new officer team!

With mythic starting next week and Onineko probably going to fail killing any new bosses for a while, I decided to stretch my creative mind and publicly roast Onineko’s new (and old!) officer team to amp everyone up for the upcoming constant and repeated wipes yeaaaaaaaaaaaaah! First up, the dudebros that got the guild this far, you’ve probably never seen them do anything because lets face it, they never did, starting in chronological order of when they became an officer...

Guild clears heroic, PUBG 1.0 releases the next day. Coincidence? Merry Xmas Onineko!

Good Afternoon Guildies and Guildettes and welcome to what may or may not be the last post of Antorus progression by yours truly, the god of healing, Roaktahl! To business first, and while we’re still not sure if you should start moving when he first casts cone of shame or when he’s finished or if you should just start moving halfway through and fuck everybody else (this is what I was doing fyi), Argus the Unmaker has been defeated in...

The GM is dead, long live the GM!

I thought this deserved it’s own post as hey, how often do we have a new Guild Master in the house? As the guy who made the awful awful mistake of promoting Ctwin to GM in the first place, and as a guy who (excluding all the people who’ve known him longer) has known Yog the longest (we in fact met in Azeroth some 12 years ago) AND as a former Onineko GM myself, I’ve declared myself the only man...

Shattered Illusions and Broken Dreams 10/11H – BROUGHT TO YOU BY FACEMASHER FLASKS!

Shattered Illusions and Broken Dreams 10/11H – BROUGHT TO YOU BY FACEMASHER FLASKS!

I’m a pretty big Warcraft fan. Not just World of Warcraft mind you, Warcraft from all the way back to the RTS games. My favourite, WCIII and its expansion The Frozen Throne, are way up there in my nostalgic childhood video game memories. Varimathras the Dreadlord…well he was a bit of a cunt, but being a Dreadlord and a Demon and all that, it’s probably not all that surprising. So when Sylvannas manipulated Varimathras into serving the Forsaken in TFT...

Early boss pulls, externals too hard to call, Turtle wins tanking award on his second day and more! 8/11H

Last night, Onineko triumphed in the face of self-imposed adversity as the guild rallied under the one person not actually in the guild to score it’s first ever win against the Coven of Shivarra! Whoop whoop! After clearing to the demon maidens in just over two hours on our second week, despite Groffrey pulling half a dozen bosses early and nearly dying. We convinced Raid Leader Yog that no, we shouldn’t learn a new boss at 10:30pm on a Thursday...

Progression and how not having Groff makes it happen – A Study by Roaktahl (7/11H)

Progression and how not having Groff makes it happen – A Study by Roaktahl (7/11H)

I’m back by popular demand (Yog asked me really nicely) with a rare website update for the good people of Onineko. I’ll start by first admitting it brings me absolutely no pleasure to point out the glaringly obvious omission in tonight’s raid, the boss, the kingpin, the guy that apparently causes all the wipes, I know him as Ctwin, but you might also know him from other characters such as Arduous, Primalous, Zealous, Tortious, Felpacket, Charlietango, Feintnow, Terrorous, Valorous, Derpcircle...

Updat.

thing. we did one. No, updating a website wasn’t it. oh hey, we’re recruiting. So if you like opening a desk drawer, dangling your dong (or clit – we’re equal opportunity failtards) in, then slamming the drawer repeatedly until you pass out – apply here.

Normal KJ Dead, Heroic Sufficiently wounded, Onineko screenshotting still sucks

Normal KJ Dead, Heroic Sufficiently wounded, Onineko screenshotting still sucks

Onineko cruised into week one of Tomb with a ravenous hunger not seen since the last time Blizzard made us wait months and months for new content…so Nighthold? The one before that? Doesn’t matter…the point is, in just one week, we’ve cleared approximately 72% of the content we will realistically be able to, setting the guild up for an extremely long period of farming Tomb over and over and over and you get the point. Still, and this is likely...

Something something Roak is the best something something no Groff? 10/10H!

Something something Roak is the best something something no Groff? 10/10H!

ROAK POAST IS BACK! After suffering through the last two posts, the people of Onineko have spoken* and I have returned to dribble bits of my brain out onto the Internet for the joy of some and the chagrin of the rest. …but first a word from our sponsors! Do you own a Nintendo Switch? If yes then you are either me, Turtle or a filthy rotten liar. Get a Switch and buy Zelda, it’s like WoW if it were set...

Tichondrididn’t, Elistahped. 9/10H

On the back of reaping us some botanical gardens, our freshmeat (holy shit we got recruits, AND THEY ARE RANGED!?!?!) ventured further into Nighthold and poked some more bosses. Despite a rocky start on the “easy boss” AKA bridge boss – somehow we landed at Tich’s feet at like 9:30. Tich didn’t really last long, the dicks were huge and the dps was brought. huh. So that was a thing. Blowing lust on some trash before Elisande felt weird, but...