Things Dead – possibly also our Guild Herald 3/7Hc

Hello and welcome to another boss kill post courtesy of guest poster / former always poster and current #1 healer with not one, but TWO legendaries, Roaktahl!

So first we went and fought Nythendra, he/she is some sort of dinosaur with an STD and bugs crawling out everywhere, it’s a bit gross… Anyway, the fight started with an explanation from Kupp that I didn’t listen to…and from the amount of people dying to mechanics, I assume nobody else listened to.

So we fumbled around for a bit until Captain Obvious (aka Lic) decided to blatantly state the obvious (don’t stand in bad, hit things good) and suddenly things started going really well and an attempt or two later the boss dieded. It was really fun and I was best healer.

Next came the four dragons.

It began, as expected with a sleep inducing explanation from Kupp that this time I’m positive nobody listened to. This fight was an absolute clusterfuck and I still don’t really know what happens, there’s two dragons, then there’s four dragons, but only two do stuff, and there’s some stacks of things that also sometimes do some stuff but it only ever matters if you get to ten stacks (protip, don’t get ten stacks).

The fight would’ve been alright if the tanks could remember which thing they were supposed to tank and not tank the other things but at least they came clean when they fucked up instead of blaming someone/something else (like not having a legendary). Anyway, after shit went south and half the raid got 10 stacks and were stunned for thirty seconds, the remaining people who weren’t on Peggy’s side managed to kill the boss.

Also I came first on heals, probably cause I have two legendaries.

No you’re a towel.

Then after fighting a giant dragon trash add, we came up against vagina boss. If I didn’t understand either of the previous two fights, I definitely didn’t understand this one. Having not learned from previous experience, Kupp attempted to explain the fight, but I was busy.

From what I could tell squinting out from my bloodshot eyes. There’s adds, lots of adds, tentacle adds and some other kind of tentacle adds, then occasionally you get a tree add or a dragon add, oh and blob adds, blob adds are annoying cause they fixate people and you can’t just stand still and space out for seconds at a time.

So anyway after you kill lots and lots of adds, the vagina opens and you can penetrate inside it and tickle the inside bit. Do this twice (cause vagina boss demands satisfaction) and you win. Protip, don’t ask vagina boss what it wants for dinner as it results in a divide by zero error.

I didn’t win this fight cause Mx and Lic are heal sniping cunts.

Some people are attended and they will probably be copy/pasted here by someone else.